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July 26 CHURCHIANITYYou know, I was reading a couple of articles on line about the Anglican Church this evening: it went on and on about gay marriage, how unwed moms can get hitched AND get their kid(s) baptized in one ceremony, etc. I just shake my head an wonder how a supposed Christian denomination can be Christian when it’s not based on the Bible? Well, in our bulletins today was an excerpt from C. S. Lewis’ “Screwtape Letters” where we have one demon (supposedly Satan) training his nephew on how to keep a Christian out of walking with Christ. Lewis writes (Satan speaking): “You must arrange to make him a devout Methodist or Anglican...he must come to accept the church as a type of religious social club...help him become more religious, but for hell’s sake, not more Christian!” ZING! or for some readers just a big fat “YEOWCH!!” My main point in that quote was the Anglican church and how they have really become a religious social club (save those who have broken off to become what is known as the “Anglican Church of North America”). So I have found Facebook to be addicting in a negative way. I find I couldn’t live without knowing if Kristen’s kids ate the new french toast she made? Did Alex have a good time in Maine? And why did Ruth suddenly disappear off everyone’s friends list? I have collected a number of hearts (from many different apps) and hugs, but my farm town is failing. I had to get off FB!! It was taking away time from everything else – everything that is far more important. It was becoming my god. However, it has saved me money in that I am not going to attend my 30th class reunion...I have reunited with those I wanted to through FB! Why worry about losing weight to look good in September? However, has FB replaced blogging? I see all my blog buddies on my FB friends list. For me, however, being far more verbose that FB allows, I prefer the realm of the blog and regret not having shared via this method more frequently. I will not go off FB forever, and I may skulk about in the background a bit, but hopefully this will be my primary source in order to really communicate. For anyone who doesn’t know (but I think you all do) blogger G came up to take care of me when I came back from the hospital – I just wanted to send out more public thank you’s to her!! (Do her a favor, do her friday folderol...I even dreamed about it one night). So today’s service – let me narrow that down a bit – for this morning’s service, Pastor talked about being the BRIDE OF CHRIST. Sounds a bit like the “Bride of Frankenstein” (and Pastor did clarify this evening that he did not marry a gorilla which I believe made his dear wife very happy). The BRIDE is the church. Not just PAG where I go, but the entire church body world wide. (I am stealing shamelessly from Pastor’s message so credit goes to Pastor JQ of PAG). God wanted us to be in a forever love affair with Christ...thus, the church becomes the bride, which can make some men get a little squeamish but I am sure they will be SOO grateful they made it into heaven, they won’t care if they are wearing the veil. God wants us united with Christ “not having any spot or wrinkle or any such thing. (as Pastor pointed out, that’s why He gave us Oxy-Clean). It’s really a pretty big honor to be blessed to sit at the marriage supper of the Lamb! Imagine, He is getting married, and as His spouse He says “I pick....YOU!” and he points right at us! Ok, so what’s my point? The Church is where the discipleship happens, it’s where you go to grow! It’s where the Spirit can minister to us (“wherever two or more are gathered in His name”), it’s where the Bible is taught, where we find our strength and our fellowship. (fellowship does not equal social club). Pastor told a story that went something like this: There was a man at a bazaar selling pigeons. To keep them with him, he put tied a string around the leg, and a ring at the other end that slipped over a pole. This arrangement allowed the pigeons to walk around, but the stick kept them going in a circle. One day a buyer came along. Having a compassionate heart, he bought ALL the pigeons and then told the seller to let them all go free. The seller cut the strings, but the pigeons didn’t go anywhere. The buyer said “Shoo! Shoo!” and some flew off as far as 100’, but everywhere they landed, they continued to peck in a circle. How do we fit in? SALVATION is the seller cutting the string...DISCIPLESHIP is being reconditioned so we don’t keep going around in a circle! Disciples are made in church – that’s “being about [our] Father’s business!” We are to make sure that whatever church we go to the Scriptures are respected, taught, and the Holy Spirit is present. Makes me think the Anglican church isn’t having any of that going on – or several other churches for that matter. That stuff interferes with the social club ambiance, rather, as C S Lewis put it, one demon to another, “If you can obscure these facts, there’s a good chance that he will embrace what hell considers to be the perfect synonym for true religion – churchianity.” So, are you practicing churchianity? Or Christianity? March 26 Facebook, Saving, and Holiness (how eclectic!)Ok, so a little over a month has gone by and where have I been? I guess you could say trying to battle some personal demons by myself – it doesn’t work that way, does it. However, gratefully because of God’s help, these demons seem to have raced out of the room this week -- adios and don’t let the door hit you on the way out !! Has anyone been reading Facebook a little too much (or have you even seen it at all yet)? It’s a little like email, a little like a blog, a little like a chat...My fascination has been in how many people from my high school class are on there now. It’s our 30th Class Reunion this year, the admin is on there, and little by little the “friends” list is growing for Needham HS Class of ‘79. I’m not sure what else draws me...perhaps reading what co-workers are doing on the weekend? One very smiling friend from work always has an upbeat message – if it’s not sunny outside, her status messages will make the sun shine regardless! I can follow along with someone’s daughter as she celebrates her first birthday...see that a theater friend may be moving to Tampa, keep in touch with a friend as he moves to northern Canada...even find a long-lost friend that I have occasionally shed tears over. Perhaps it satisfies some odd voyeuristic need in me...to be connected, but not TOO connected...I’ll look at the pics of your child’s graduation, but I don’t want to listen about it. Anyone else been sucked into this?
I went for a walk today, was trying to make it a “nickel walk” but didn’t have much success. What’s a nickel walk? It’s when I take a plastic bag and collect all the returnable bottles and cans. My lack of success was due to lack of a sidewalk where there WERE nickels, and no nickels where there were sidewalks. However, I as I was driving today, I found a place where there are many nickels, and I may take that walk this weekend if the rain stays away. I have this overwhelming urge as I drive to stop and pick up the cans. One family in my acquaintance saved enough to take a weekend away. I am this way with coupons – I love going on line to find coupons for the items I actually BUY. It’s amazing how many websites have coupons for the clipping. For example, there is never a need to pay full price for Stoneyfield Farms yogurt. Also – do you love a particular product? Tell the manufacturer! Make sure you include your name and mailing address – voila! Coupons!
Ok, so on to a different subject. Lately I have been pondering something I don’t think I have ever thought about before. The Holiness of God and what does it REALLY MEAN? Pastor says in church all the time how Holy God is. How set apart He is. But what IS that? I was feeling detached from any and all meaning that has. How do I make that real for me so I can understand? So I can share? Bring out the book Downpour by James MacDonald. Chapter Two is entitled “God on the Throne, a Picture of Holiness” and this chapter attempts to explain the Holiness of God. It’s a very powerful chapter! One issue explained what “holy” means – it is separated, it is apart – when we think of God we must think “separation” – God is so totally different and apart from us, we cannot truly comprehend Him. God is infinitely exalted. If you check out Isaiah 6, there is this pretty succinct picture of God on His Throne...there is no physical description except that of His robe: “I saw the Lord sitting on a throne, high and lifted up, and the train of His robe filled the temple.” (nkjv) When brides want their trains to be so long they reach back to the church door, when Queen Elizabeth wears her long red robe – what splendor! Now imagine God’s robe – it fills that whole temple! And imagine how BIG that temple is ! I suspect Isaiah couldn’t even see the ends of the temple. There were six-winged cherubim flying around – 1 pair of wings covering their faces and 1 pair of wings covering their feet (the other pair of wings was flying them around). Why did they have wings over their faces? The GLORY of GOD is too much to gaze upon (and far too bright for sunglasses to be effective). Now go to Ezekiel 1: Eze 1:26 And above the firmament over their heads [was] the likeness of a throne, in appearance like a sapphire stone; on the likeness of the throne [was] a likeness with the appearance of a man high above it. Eze 1:27
You’ll notice Ezekiel can’t quite get the right words out....”It was like...but sort of, but maybe not, but it had an appearance of...like...like...” Why? Because there ARE NO WORDS to describe what he saw. Then all he could do was fall on his face! God is holy – God demands separation – and it didn’t take Ezekiel long to get that clue right! God was so Holy and Ezekiel was just so not ... well, you get the picture, Now in Revelation 20: 11 Rev 20:11 God is so holy, even the earth and heaven flee. Flip back to Isaiah 6:3: And one cried to another and said: "Holy, holy, holy [is] the LORD of hosts; The whole earth [is] full of His glory!" Did you know that in Hebrew, when emphasis is placed on a word, it is repeated? To understand this, Pastor James uses a storm as an example. If there was a thunderstorm last night, we might say, “That was quite a storm we had last night.” If we were to then say, “Wow, did you catch the news? They are having one heck of storm-storm in the Panhandle!” This repetition shows force. Of course, when describing Hurricane Katrina, well, that was a storm-storm-storm !! In the Bible, there is only one word that is used as a “three-peat” and that is the attribute of God: HOLY. Holy holy holy is the Lord of Hosts! Another peek at God’s throne room is found again in Revelation: Rev 4:1 Rev 4:2 Rev 4:3 Rev 4:4 Rev 4:5 Rev 4:6
Rev 4:8 Can you imagine being John in the presence of so much splendor, wonder, noise, beauty, awe, and hearing the angelic chorus crying out “Holy Holy Holy!” Just blows me away! Yet how many refer to God as “The Man Upstairs” – sorry, I don’t think of this image of God as just a guy upstairs. Remember, He just ISN’T us. He is wholly apart and separate from us, He is wholly Holy ! Pastor James sums it up nicely, “If you do know and love the Lord, never let God’s holiness get far from your focus. Remember who He really is and what it means to account to this God of infinite, indescribable holiness.” February 21 Not sure I am really back for good, but perhaps a little while…Wow, I have been gone a long time…and I see in being gone, almost every contact has been deleted…not sure if that’s a system thing or a personal thing, either way, it’s a wake-up call! Joe and I are still together – we had a rocky moment back in November but have decided to see where this goes. My work has changed- I am once again the DSL/HSI specialist for Verizon New England and am thrilled to be doing this job again. I feel tremendously challenged and rewarded – not many people can say that about their job. However, it does involve a commute to Andover which is up by the NH border…my regular office is near the RI border. It’s quite a commute, right thru Boston at rush hour, but I just love it when I get there. I try to get there 3 days/week. Each Monday, however, I have been taking customer calls. Although I don’t care for it, I am grateful to have a job and try very hard not to complain. My concern is with THIS Monday, my calls will be in regards to FIOS which is a fabulous product, but I have been away from the FIOS world for so long, I am very nervous about taking calls…my fear is appearing like a blithering idiot with the customer and then the customer losing all confidence in their experience with Verizon. Others in the same position have demanded training, but some of my friends were thrown online unexpectedly a couple weeks ago (in the same boat as myself) and they survived – I don’t even think there was any scarring. If they can do it, I can do it. Or, at least I can laugh at myself at the end of the day!! My team leader has promised to sit with me and coach me until I feel more comfortable – she’s AWESOME!!! The kids are all well, my youngest is spending the weekend with me, my daughter is spending the weekend with her dad, and Colin got off work at 3pm today so he is now home as well. The dog, Goosie, is asleep near my feet. My February vacation is coming to an end tomorrow – it was quiet for the most part, but I have spent time working on some of the rooms. Still need plastering/spackling done and so much painting…but since in this economy the house has little value, I might as well give it a good facelift since I’m clearly not leaving anytime soon! Health-wise I have been sick off and on, although that evil flu that has been going around did remarkably little damage other than give me a good enough case of bronchitis to have multiple asthma attacks. I spent a good deal of January hooked up to my nebulizer. I did get a chance to see the difference in both my blood pressure and my pulse when I am NOT using the neb when I am sick…my blood pressure sky rocketed as did my pulse! My doctor said, “It’s because your heart is working so hard to pump oxygen!” YIKES! No more convincing needed. I have also battled stomach bugs My relationship with Christ is not bad nor is it “on the rocks” – I just feel that I need to pursue it more. I need a personal revival. Been reading my Bible a lot, been doing devotionals, spending a lot of time in prayer (although sometimes I get distracted while I am in prayer and my mind wanders…that’s frustrating). Not sure what else to write at the moment…I need to do some blog hopping (made easier now that I have just downloaded ALL of Windows Live applications). You can also catch up with me on facebook – a different forum but fun. Take care and God bless !! July 08 day 2 back to blogging...So I am back to blogging -- I have missed it, and yet for a while there my heart wasnt in it...perhaps it was because my EX found my blog and didn't like it? I honestly don't know...but he and I are friends, and I won't stop reaching out to great blog buddies (some of whom have become more than blog buddies -- G !!!!) and sharing thoughts and feelings with awesome people -- my ex, who isn't an "ex-friend" by any means, will need to understand, and I am sure he will come to appreciate it all.
I guess I let everyone know I have found someone wonderful -- his name is Joe. I pray God take care of him and bless our relationship so it can continue to be a Godly one -- Joe has been thru a lot and needs prayer, but he is not "needy" and wow, I hope I am not that to him, either !!!! He just rocks my world...wise in his faith and the Bible, it's so cool to be able to have a BIBLICAL discussion with him!! We give and take...we SHARE ideas. No one is right or wrong, and it's so amazing -- is this an idyllic relationship? Wake me up, Lord, if this is just a dream!! Wait, don't!!!! I am enjoying this dream! But who am I do deserve THIS joy? THIS love? THIS happiness? I am no one. I am a "wave tossed in the ocean, a vapor in the wind". Sometimes I wish it were possible to hug away all the pain in someone else's life...I can't, and it's a very helpless feeling. We can only be who we are today.
And as I type this, I am listening to Mercy Me's "Spoken For" what an AWESOME song! I have loved that song for the past several years!
Roey recently sang "So Long Self" at church, maybe I can figure out how to upload it on to this site so you can all enjoy it ! woohooo!!
My oldest, Colin, has gotten his car on the road ---it's insured, registered, and Mass stickered -- wow, a lot to accomplish at once! I give him kudos for doing it himself! Long time coming, but life long lesson, also. Someday he will have a son, and he will explain what HE had to do to get HIS first car!
Roey is enjoying her summer -- she has truly bonded with Joe's daughters who are 15 & 19 -- she is having a great time with them, and with her friends who, by the way JUST stopped by and she is sleeping over her friend Erin's house. Since when do 15-yr-olds look like models? It's a universal thing it seems...she looks like a model (doubt me? I will post her pic!!!!!!) and Joe's daughters look like models...and her friends look like models, and Joe's daughters' friends look like models... DID WE look like that back then? In the 70's and 80's ???? I think NOT!
Wow, Mercy Me just did "Here With Me" -- we sing that at church, the video is very powerful !!
So, anyone who wants to share Pandora Radio with me, please check out: http://www.pandora.com/?tc=e-001425-0035-1137&sc=sh19202133103139348
May God bless you all this evening, and sorry I havent been a more faithful blogger...I will continue to try !!  July 07 Update (by instruction - lol)Ok, so I was told that it would be a good idea to add an update to my blog this way:
"I met someone. He's nice to me. I like him."
That's it. HA HA HA HA HA !!!
 That really cracked me up, but it was worth adding only because those were his words, not mine.Yeah, I am in love. I met someone WONDERFUL. He's not just nice to me, he treats me like GOLD! And I like him so much I LOVE him!
we met on eHarmony -- a local boy -- turns out I have been driving by his neighborhood for the past 2 years, to and from work. We share our faith, and find we compliment each other in everything else. Oh, first date back in April, the sparks were FLYING !! To heck with 4th of July fireworks, we had our own going from the moment we met! We havent been apart since.
Therefore, if I seem a bit distant, it is really only distraction. I will try to share more later!
With love to all April 02 hello everyone!You thought I had given up, right? Nahhhh! Just a lot of stuff going on, some I don't feel ok sharing, other stuff I do!
My son, my oldest who is 20, has an opportunity to join the phone company, make a LOT of money, get full benefits, and I was assured by my director he would be hired...why won't he apply? He can't pass the drug test.
My job has also changed...I have been the DSL "Duchess" for the past 3 years for New England. Upper management decided I needed to be skilled in FIOS now, and rightly so, so now I am online, talking to customers about FIOS (which is AMAZING). It is quite a change for me, however, one I was unnecessarily nervous about but trusting in God, I knew I could do it. So far so good!
Financially things are rough, I am asking for prayer and wisdom for that, but again, God takes all the yukkiness and messes we make out of our lives and turns it for good eventually. I know this is part of the "yukkiness" and trust whole heartedly that HIS plan is awesome! Amen!
My pastor's wife shared a story about a wealthy man who, every time he saw a penny, picked it up. His friends found this behavior odd until they asked him, "Why do you, a wealthy man, pick up every penny you see?" The man replied, "On each penny is written 'In God We Trust' and each penny is an opportunity for me to ask, 'Am I really trusting you, Lord?' and it allows me that time to re-evaluate my purpose."
So each time you see a penny, pick it up, and see it as an opportunity to put your trust in Jesus. March 02 a weekend of tears and asthmaMy friend at church, Janet -- well, her mom died Friday. When her mom died, my mom died all over again. Yesterday I got a call from a beloved friend in Maine telling me a mutual friend is dying -- he has, at best, 6 months. So I have cried and cried -- I don't do death well only because I have lost my mum, my daddy, my sister, and my brother, and now all my aunts who tried to be there for me. When someone dies, it's like I lose every member of my family over and over again. And of course, having asthma doesnt help, the stress makes me wheeze more, I actually wasn't well enough to go to church. I had my daughter tell me all about the message so I can "catch up".
I pray Janet's mum found the Lord, I pray Lee and his wife will find Him before he goes. I want to see Lee again and meet his wife, once in heaven. The thought of Lee in hell is too horrific for words. Please pray for my friend, Janet, and please pray that my friend Lee will find Christ before he dies. Thanks everyone. February 29 Another Friday home sick...Can I just say I hate having asthma? I take meds regularly (pulmicort & serevent -- dont tell me about advair - I ended up in the hospital after that stuff) PLUS I do neb treatements when I need them. Well, last night, I needed 'em. I take a combo of Ipratropium Bromide and Albuterol Sulfate -- greatest combo in the world, but I am sick after each treatment. However, I can BREATHE! Never underestimate the gift of breathing! It is worth being sick for, believe me!
Ok, it's Friday, Gail hasnt posted her Friday Feast yet, but I thought I would jump off her most recent posting (without a parachute):
Your six-year old niece wants you to have a tea party with her. Are you too old to join her? , Ok, I love my kids, but I dont do well with little kids. My own were different, but I was not meant to be a tea party type person. I would divert my niece into something else, believe me.
Favorite movie of all time and why? Hmmm...at one time in my life I would say "Oliver" but as an adult I think the greatest movie I have seen is "Amadeus" (it's actually my wallpaper right now) -- I was fascinated with the storyline...did actual research on Mozart and Constanze...I just find it intriguing! Plus, you can't beat Mozart's fire in his music.
Your daughter and her husband are having a baby and they want to name it after their favorite baseball player: Ok, here is where I would stomp my foot and call them freaks. Yup. Then I would suggest names I never was able to use myself. But I would absolutely positively NOT cooperate with the baseball thing. I LOVE baby names, probably half the reason I did so much creative writing was to bring cool names to LIFE! My most significant naming experiences were COLIN GEOFFREY, ROSEMARY LAUREL, and CUYLER DUNCAN. Other names I love: Holly Christine, Lily Elizabeth, Merry-Lee Elizabeth, also i love the name Briony! and I love the name TRUAN for a boy.
Oh, and as a side note, I love the name Gail gave to The Girl. It is WONDERFUL. February 16 Another friday feastThis Friday Feast is a challenge...but I will do my very best...
Appetizer
Name one thing that is unique about you. I guess I would have to say ME...like G, my soul. God made me unique and He knew what He was doing! (any doubts, check out psalm 139) My laughter keeps me unique...at work I giggle so much it even once made a co-worker frustrated ("We are miserable and you are giggling! SHUT UP!" -- later on she said, "I love you" --- I never took offense) I am always happy and giggling at work!
Fill in the blank: My favorite ______ is _______ but I like ________, too Well oh my, I could say my favorite show on TV is LOST but I like Biggest Loser, too....or I could say my favorite theatrical production is Les Miserables, but I like Chicago, too. My favorite ice cream is Butter Crunch, but I like Peppermint Stick, too. My favorite movie is Amadeus, but I like Oliver too...my favorite A&E production is Pride & Prejudice, but I like their version of Emma too.
What colors do you like to decorate with? This is EASY...cranberrys, deep greens, blues, browns, and black!
What level of responsibility do you have in your job? This is kind of weird for me. First of all, I created my job. But there isn't headcount to make me a manager, so I am an acting manager doing what I do in New England. And I love every minute of it. I am responsible for all high speed internet that goes terribly terribly wrong! And to somehow use "my magic" as they call it, to make it right again and to make the customer love us.
What's up for the weekend? My two younger kids have chosen a secret recipe to learn how to make tomorrow night...they then will replicate it for their dad, step-mom, and grampa Tuesday night! Church tomorrow morning! I have Monday, Wed, Thurs, & Fri off as well -- and I have my younger son until the 24th so this week is going to be wonderful! Wishing all who visit here a delightful weekend, prayerfully you will soak in TheWord Sunday AM, and have treasured time with friends and family.
Stay blessed!
Lols
February 09 epiphanyAppetizer: Why do you enjoy the Friday's Feast so much? I am new to the Friday feast...I am just a born surveryor I guess!
Soup: Birch beer or root beer? Root beer...better yet, A&W at an A&W stand which I doubt even exists anymore. I do enjoy birch beer, but we have almost no soda in my house to begin with, I get root beer on the weekends I have my Cuy.
Salad: You are just sitting down to dinner and friends stop by. What do you do? I will add to what I have or be creative. No one goes away hungry in my house!
Main Course? Caribbean or Alaskan cruise? Alaskan, oh so to see the snow covered peaks, to just enjoy the weather! WOW!!!!
Dessert: Milk or dark chocolate? Yuck I dont' like chocolate, well, I sorta do, but dont even remotely crave it...can we do cheese cake, plain, instead please?
Ok, so there ya go. What is my blog on today? SELF FORGIVENESS. This is elusive to us all, I believe, yet something attainable. I have a tendency to blame myself for all the wrong in my life, whether I caused it or not, I must have been able to do SOMETHING. And I didn't. Therefore, I caused the wrong. I didn't recognize it, I didn't see it in time...so much.
I dream very vividly every night. Therefore, when I learned of biblical heroes who received visions at night, in their dreams, I went, yeah, yeah, whatever, I have vivid dreams too, every night!!!! Well, one night, I met a cowboy...he told me, "Well, it seems to me that it's time to move on." First of all, I am never where there are cowboys (new england, give me a break) and secondly, no one in my dreams EVER gives me advice. I remember looking at the wall and laughing, "Yeah, it's so easy for YOU to say!" and he responded, "You first need to forgive yourself." I struggled with that for the rest of the dream, even though it took me other places, to the point where I woke up and said to God, "You want me to forgive myself??? I DONT KNOW HOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" and I was advised to let go of the pain. The pain. That pain defined me. It was WHO I WAS. I was to give up the very person I had become? What would I be? An empty shell? Nothing? I could see myself holding onto the pain as if it were a package of rags I was carrying in a sack. Take THIS AWAY? So I wrestled with it...I argued with God (imagine Him saying, go for it, wrestle as much as you want, I'm still gonna win). I finally said, "Ok, it's yours, take it." But I was still afraid.
I was driving along a couple hours later, and heard Casting Crowns "East to West" -- about how it seems we are one mistake from messing it all up, but that's not true. It occurred to me that I WASNT one mistake away, that I WAS forgiven, and who am I not to forgive myself if our LORD, our Jehova, forgave me??? I busted out in tears, and then realized I still hadn't handed over the pain, and at that point I was willing to say, "God, this may hurt me very much, and I don't know who I will be when you are done with me, but reach down with Your Hand, deep inside, and pull out all the pain, just TAKE IT!!!" And He did. It didn't hurt. And, even better, he replaced the pain with joy.
Talked to my Pastor about it, he said I had an "epiphany" -- well, not sure about that, just know the pain is gone, the joy is in place, and HOPE is finally in my heart. HOPE was elusive. It existed in my head but not in my heart. It now is there, too. And Satan has already started to attack me, and I have FOUGHT BACK with awesome results. FEAR is not from God. My pastor leaned over his desk in anger at me when I told him I was afraid. Now I understand. Fear is NOT FROM GOD. Halelujah!
I am not one mistake from messing it all up. I can fight fear because God is stronger. I don't have to lose the joy HE has given me as a replacement for pain.\
PRAISE GOD I AM HIS. January 26 FrugalityHey there, I know it's been a while, and I can't say that I have anything extraordinary to add now, but we have been working on Frugality...January has been the month where we don't buy anything we don't absolutely need.
So far so good, especially in light of the septic back up and the whole house pipe cleaning I needed a couple weeks ago. The money was there.
Is it there for the mortgage? Well, yes and no. It's there now. I will pay the mortgage. God will take care of the rest, He always does. The money will manage to be there, because I can't add well just by doing it in my head, and He always finds some way for me to meet my bills.
So, I get the gas bill today. We heat by gas. My house has 4 zones, and my bedroom is shut off entirely. Actually, another section of the house is shut off as well. HOWEVER...despite our frugality this month with heat, we show using MORE than last January!! I know we havent used the oven more, I know (based on the pile of laundry down cellar) we havent used the dryer more...what on earth is going on???
We are also working on the electric bill...we got it down to $133 during Christmas - and yes, our tree had lights, and I had a sweet polar bear and a couple of pine trees with lights on outside. We are working to get it down under $100 for the month. Is anyone else this challenged? Does anyone have any ideas what we are doing wrong? I welcome any and all suggestions (keep in mind, I live in a farmhouse built in 1855).
Grocery bill is doing well, and I find myself, no matter what, picking up a couple things for the Pembroke Food Pantry. No matter how tough my situation gets, it's worse for others. I am so grateful to God I can walk thru the aisles of Stop-n-Shop and purchase food. I may have to be careful, but wow, I am sooo blessed! How can I not bless others? I love coupons.com and smartsource.com. I also check out many brand name websites as they have offers you don't find unless you check 'em out! (ex: Welch's grape juice has several coupons + a free pedometer!)
I read the Simple Dollar daily, and he has many down-to-earth ideas. Just wish I could figure out that gas bill !!
What do YOU do to be frugal? (I dont want to hear about 2-ply toilet tissue being split into 1...) Please share.
Love to all,
Lols November 21 Happy Thanksgiving!Not sure how many are truly thankful this Thanksgiving. No slam on anyone. Thankfulness is a choice, and very frequently it is a near impossible choice. Thus the phrase "sacrifice of thanksgiving". Basically you feel that life bites, but Thanks God anyways. In reality, this is true. Life can bite the big one, but GOD reigns supreme, and it is HE who changes our lives from ugh to WOW !!! So, sometimes, it's almost impossible to praise Him and thank Him...but try it...in the shower...driving in the car...stuck in traffic...stuffed to the gizzard with wayyyy to much turkey and can't watch the game because you have yet someone else's house to go to...praise GOD in this. He honestly will bless you in the midst of it all.
Thanksgiving isnt a day, God has asked us to make it a way of life. So, may you all be blessed on your journey during this way of life !
Lols October 21 Another Joyful Lord's Day to All !Hi all !
This has been an uneventful week...meaning, I am recovering from an upper respiratory infection and spent most of the time in bed, but the doctor did tell me my blood pressure was fantastic (110/70) and with my family history, I am just praising God for that!
Did read an awesome book, and would like to recommend it: In a Pit, With a Lion, on a Snowy Day by Mark Batterson. He takes the passage from 2 Samuel about Benaiah, one of David's "mighty men" and talks about how we need to chase the lions in our life, but it's generally not something we think of doing. Also watched the film (from the book which I have read) "A Case for Christ" by Lee Strobel, AND watched the full theatrical version of "The Gospel of John" not to mention spending some quality time in Scripture.
My new reciprocating saw arrived -- a steal from eBay. That's a scary thing, thinking of me wielding a reciprocating saw. However, I am certain I will have some fun with it (and some work).
Well, that's about it, not sure why some can't see my blog, and others can, hopefully it's not a "user error" and I can blame windows live.
Hope all have a great week, will try to write some later in the week if I get a chance.!! September 27 Train of thought - early morning ThursdayOk, not skilled enough yet to "embed" a video, but wanted to share this one as it cracked me up SO BAD !! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ey24x-5INkU
My kind of humor! (yes, it's clean!!!)
So what am I doing up at 4:56AM? You got me there, I am clueless myself. Not even sure I have words of wisdom to share, but I guess I don't always need them.
Train of thought...(remember that from 10th grade english class?)...The fan in here, which doesn't have a good stand but oscilates anyways, makes a lot of noise as it bangs against the wall...sure, I could have returned it, but I think I threw away the instructions. My son tried to put it together the first time, and he failed, he got it backwards (perhaps what he was tokin' didn't agree with fan management). I did catch it on film..."Colin and Goose Assemble a Fan"
So yesterday I said, since you aren't stoned, would you mind assembling my fan correctly? Which he did. The stand still doesn't match up (no fault of his) but a little gorilla tape has helped settle it a bit.
I just got an email saying "Find your secret crush" -- my crush ain't secret, but I lost him anyways, his name was Lance. If you find him in Virginia Beach, please ask him to call me...
Thursday...nearing the end of my September vacation, and yet what did I do yesterday? I talked to a couple of work colleagues about stuff going on at work. One meant to "save as draft" something until I got back but he accidently sent it out to our region and got spanked for it. I felt badly I wasnt there as a filter for him. It was great info, just not for the masses.
What do I plan on doing today? Well, for one, I plan on cleaning up this hole I live in...11 rooms of ANTIQUE DIRT. Yep. I remember someone telling me, when you buy an antique home, you buy the antique dirt. Can I tell you...dirt, I mean real DIRT, comes into this house from every nook and cranny and space between the wide pine floors. This is NOT "Colonial Homes" magazine. I don't know how those people do it. It's one room at a time, and I pray God allows me to sell this and buy something newer, smaller, and more energy efficient! At one point, when I was married, the hubby was all into restoration...that faded quickly...now I own the house, all 11 forsaken rooms (ok, my computer room is cool, if I could just get the floor stripped, so is my bedroom, the kitchen is modern, too, tyvm!) and I am left with fixing the places where the horsehair plaster has pulled away from the lathe to such an extent I need to buy a sawsall and insert wallboard in large chunks. I still don't know how to fix the ceiling in Cuy's room...it is falling apart over his bed. The previous owners screwed can lids onto the ceiling...homemade plaster buttons...but they aren't holding the buckling plaster anymore. Yup, buckling. This is what I come home to after HOURS of work (I love my job, don't get me wrong) it's just that sometimes I wish I could just STAY at my job so I didn't have to come home to buckling plaster, holes in the wall, and DIRT. Anyone with any suggestions is WELCOME to comment and advise!
Ok so now my mind has jumped to the Pembroke Food Pantry (dont ask how I made that mental connection) and I am so thrilled that my church has decided to be an official drop off spot for the Pantry! When I was first separated, my kids and I availed ourselves of the services of the South Shore Women's Center...it was a hide-away for battered women and children. I never ever needed the food pantry there, but in gratitude for their counseling services, I made sure it was well-stocked. That experience has given me a knowledge of what is needed for the public at large, shall we say. When the Pembroke Food Pantry published a need because they have 175 families in my town alone they support (can you imagine 175 families in an affluent community like mine needing help? How could I have been so blind?) I mentioned something at our women's ministry meeting. Then it was brought up the next day at church by a brother who works in the same building as the Food Pantry! They had approached him to ask our church for help! What an awesome coincidence (or not, with God, there is never a coincidence!) What I know they need are: toiletries, cleaning supplies, diapers larger than size "newborn" , meals like Dinty Moore they can just open/heat/serve..Tuna Helper/Chicken Helper along with cans of tuna and chicken...I guess the best way to look at it is...what do YOU use daily? These people can't just go "buy" it at CVS or Stop-n-Shop like we can.
If anyone so desires, monetary donations may be made to :
Pembroke Food Pantry
P O Box 295
Pembroke, MA 02359
Ok, well, I am done with my train of thought for this morning at least...may all be blessed today!
 LolsSeptember 25 Faith over FeelingsDoes anyone else out there like "Walk in the Word" with Pastor James MacDonald? I get the weekly devotionals, plus I love his show, and this newsletter came at an interesting time, so I thought I would share it:
September 14 Another Friday has arrived...sometimes Fridays are tough for me...they mean the end of a schedule (because of course, I am WAY too disorganized to have a schedule for the weekend!) but then again, I think that may be my problem...
Tonight includes working out and making a french toast casserole. Can you say "Juxtaposition"? Let me explain...Tomorrow is our monthly women's breakfast at church. This month is also our pastor's wife's birthday...therefore, we are having a brunch at our friend's house for her. I agreed to bring a "hot dish" and it was suggested I bring a french toast casserole. Thus...
Please understand, I have never in my life made a french toast casserole. Does that make me insecure? NO WAY! Bring it on, baby! LOL ! I will make it and they will say, "This is the most AMAZING FT casserole we have ever had!" Thousands upon thousands will come for my casserole and... sorry, got carried away there for a moment...
So, it's 7:35 and I am still in my jammies with a full work day ahead of me. Oh how I wish I could just work from home! It takes me an hour to get to work and it's an interrupted day all around. I love the people but also love my work, and I think I would get more done if I could work from home. Nuff said.
My dog, Goose, is upstairs eating leftover cat food. I honestly think dogs only chase cats because they smell like cat food. If we could make cats smell like lavender & lemon vs salmon & liver, I doubt dogs would be interested.
in chasing cats.
Normally, my kitty, Beekie, would be wrapped around my monitor...I think he is upset I have a flatscreen now, he can't climb on top and drape his paws over the screen.
I have three kitties...Lazarus who has been with us since kittenhood in 1996, Beekie who came to us last fall, and Timber who was adopted out by a dear friend. However, it's important to note, Jen, who owned Timber originally, thinks that Timber has a landscaping job on the side. One time Jen called her boyfriend and they were felling trees; in the background she could hear them calling "TIMBER!" so she realized, wow, the cat has job and isn't saying anything. I am grateful that she made me aware of this...I have seen sawdust on her paws at times, found some mulch on her tail...oh, I was suspicious, especially where she is an "indoor cat" but there are tell-"tail" signs...I wonder what she does with the money...
So, today I will go to work and attempt to resolve the DSL provisioning problems for New England. Tonight I will work out, then get what I need to make french toast casserole, make it and "chill overnight". Hopefully tonight won't be too chilly...(note to self: make sure LAB reads this today).
Tomorrow - dentist appt for the Roey, women's brunch, praise team practice at 3:30...and I have a craving for chinese food...is that on my healthy eating diet? I don't think so...
 Healthy eating diet -- did I tell you all that I dropped 11 lbs? It was probably a miracle, but I have lately been eating healthy food only, staying away from sugars, blah blah blah. Feeling so much better! But also watching portion control...that is HUGE. Even a triple helping of cottage cheese is gonna get ya nowhere! I just wish it would ALL drop off...I am ok with working out, that is awesome...I am ok with the diet, that too, is awesome...I just wish the weight would come off QUICKLY.
Good thing: where it really is only Roey and I that I feed...she is SO into healthy eating...we buy only good stuff, there is no junk food in our house...it's awesome! We went grocery shopping last night...got our salad fixings, our tofu cheese (have you tried tofu pepper jack in a salad? excellent stuff!)...our water, etc. Colin is responsible for his own meals, although I do try to think of him, too.
Ok, now it's 8:04 AM...I really need to wrap this up.
May God bless you abundantly today, may you truly FEEL His presence with you...allelujah!
Lols
 September 11 Praise His Holy Name todayI had written a whole long blog earlier that got wiped out, and it was menial now that I realize what day it is.
My life, my very existence seems menial compared to those who 1. Gave their lives unwittingly 2. Those who gave knowing the sacrifice 3. The families left behind 4. For those whom the horror of the day will not cease...
I remember a colleague saying she'd heard they'd had maps of many public schoools. I couldn't function except through God. I praise Him still for the delightful little puppy he brought into our lives...Libby...she now belongs to my ex, but her very existence represents life continuing on.
Praise God for He is Good, His love endures forever. September 08 The Wonder of a New ComputerHi all --
When Windows Live came along and all our blogs froze up, it was then I realized my 2001 dinosaur needed to be replaced. But then G told me last September that there was going to be a new version of Windows called Vista coming out. Ok so I would wait for that. Then my computer seemed to crash, so I gave it to my friend, Kim, who was sure she could resurrect it...but I had given up, resigned to replace my computer. I took the computer room apart, started stripping the floors (wide pine from 1855), and used my daughter's computer. Needless to say, my surfing came to almost a halt.
Some things happen for a reason. Kim DID fix my computer, she said the only thing wrong with it was all the dog/cat fur stuck inside. But I still didn't set my computer room back up. I continued to steal time from my daughter's. She is a blessing, never fussed, never ONCE complained to me. I tried to be considerate. She is devoted to Japanese Anime and watches it on her computer. I tried so hard not to interrupt her viewing. But it's tough. Her computer is old, it was her grampa's -- he gave it to her when he replaced his for the latest and greatest.
This whole thing kept me off line, and I believe it was a good thing. A very good thing.
However, I was "inspired" (details later perhaps) to purchase a new computer. I bought it last weekend, my oldest set it up for me this weekend, got my printer hooked up, got a new webcam (my old one didnt work with Vista -no worries - this new webcam does more for me and is designed to work with Windows Live).
I LOVE MY NEW COMPUTER !! It's an HP, core 2, and I got a flatscreen 19" monitor. And despite what others say, I am determined to embrace Windows Vista. I believe Microsoft does their best not to turn out junk, and there are seasons when things change, and the old doesn't work with the new. This has happened with Vista, it will happen again when they turn out Windows Prism or whatever they call the new one in 7 years. (Would someone suggest that name? I like it) It works fabulously with Windows Live and I haven't enjoyed reading blogs like this since I started! A wonderful new world has opened up for me.
Ok, so, to catch everyone up...I have not had that yard sale, but am still actively purging. One thing I purged is Teddy, my dog. Now don't get all crazy on me, Oh HOW could you give up your DOG??? Let me tell you first and foremost, something that is hard for me to admit...I can do the most difficult things at work with ease and laughter, but when I walk into my door at night, I am overwhelmed, to the point of wanting to just make a beeline for my bed and hide. As a single mom with a 14-yr-old and 20-yr-old at home, and my 11-yr-old as an every-other-weekender, working full time (8:30-6:30 M-F), the last thing I want to do is another "project" on my 1855 farmhouse. It is a dream for many, and was for me 13 years ago, but now I am alone doing it, and it has lost its magic. I am ready to downsize and go for new(er). However, here's the catch-22 of it, I have to do all those projects in order to sell.
So, each evening as I walked in the door, I was greeted by two OUT OF CONTROL bullmastiffs. Oh, I loved them, don't get me wrong. But have you ever had TWO BULLMASTIFFS jump on you at the same time? Granted, they were delighted to see me, and granted, I should have taught them long before not to jump, however, that was the way of things. Having had several long talks with my pastor and his wife (I recommend this for everyone), it became apparent that Teddy, the instigator, the one who liked to paw at small children in a dangerous way (what, mummy? I am just playing!), had to go in a humane way. Well, the ARL down the street closed, so that wouldn't work. Then there was someone who could possibly train him to be a police dog, but oh, dang, he took some of the dogs when the ARL closed so he was full...then there was the woman at work who wanted a dog for exercise, but the dog already living at her house didn't take kindly to canine competition. I thought it was hopeless...
Until one day I was at a friend's desk, she said, "How are your pooches doing?" (we share a doggie devotion) and I said, "Oh they are fine, although I still haven't found a good home for Teddy"
"What? You are looking for a good home for Teddy!?!?" she cries.
I explained. She said her friend, K, was looking for boxer to rescue, but was on the waiting list so long she wanted to give up. She told me they called K the "Dog Whisperer" because of her way with the most difficult of dogs. My friend was getting goose bumps. She called K and together they came over to meet Teddy. It was love at first sight (picture a big field...Teddy at one end, K at the other, both running towards each other and colliding in happy doggy kisses and scratches). K then took him for a week and refused to give him back (ok, I confess, I didn't ask for him back). They are a wonderful pair. They were meant for each other. He was only mine for a while, but for K, he is hers for a lifetime. He is a special doggie, she is a special owner. They both feel blessed, and man, so do I !!!
Now I just have Goose, the bigger of the two, the black one (in the pics) and he is just a lazy bum !! I wake him up when I come home, he is usually lazing in the dining room or the kitchen. He sleeps in his crate at night (without being asked -- he knows if I go to his cookie jar that it's bed time). The funny thing about Goosie is he is supposed to look fierce -- well, lemme tell you, a 110-lb barrel chested bullmastiff with a green squeaky toy in his mouth is anything but fierce. He is SUCH a GOOD BOY!! I throw him in the car with me a lot now and he loves any and all attention he gets. He's fantastic.
The stress level has come down when I walk in the door of my house. Well, to a degree. I am still overwhelmed but am willing to take it a bit at a time.
So, other good things in my life? I have lost weight (still have plenty to go) and have joined Koko -- Lols, you joined what??? Check it out www.kokofitclub.com. It rocks! I feel like a homie there already. I am so comfortable going, they know me, they talk to me, I can freely ask questions, and I don't feel like a gym idiot. It is the only fit club of its kind -- the koko machines are all around, but a club built around it is unique. Again, I am LOVIN it, it's a real blessing for me, and I am grateful to God that He felt it good to plant one two miles from my house (near Country Curtains, anyone else a CC fan??).
I took a haiatus from singing on the Praise Team for a while, but recently felt a real calling to re-join. However, there were already 4 people on the team, that's the max for the Praise Team, so I thought, God you must be wrong (HA HA HA HA HA HA HA). He continued to use what He could to ensure I got the message, and I did, but again, there were 4 people already. Then...someone mysteriously quit. I kid you not. She just mysteriously dropped -- off the team and out of the church. Well, that whole time when I found out, I was vacationing with the Praise Team Leader, and I did NOT mention I wanted back on. I thought it sounded terrible "Well, now that M has dropped, I want back on" EWWWW! It was SO wrong! So I waited, and I finally sent Kim an email which she shared with Pastor, and we all met together, and he felt that it was good timing (Praise God, You weren't wrong! LOL) I am joyfully back on the Praise Team and singing a solo a capella tomorrow. I also have a few other songs to do as specials as well in the future. God made it clear that I was to use my talent for song as my ministry. How more grateful to Him can I be? I am so amazingly blessed! My dearest church sisters are the other 3 on the team, what a blessing to draw near to them and sing!! (I love you Kim, LL Kool K, and K!)
Went to SoulFest in Guilford, NH again this year, and stayed at Kim's rented apartment on Weirs Beach again -- she was gracious enough to ask if Roey wanted to spend the entire week up there with them, which she did, and I joined that Friday. The ski lift wasn't operating when we were there so I couldn't re-enact my ski lift expedition of last year, but I tell you, I was so anxious to get on it again! To have conquered that gave me such a sense of accomplishment, it has opened the door for so much else in my life! My trip to NJ, WV, PA & CT with my Cuy, another trip to Bangor, and a probable trip to VA Beach at the end of this month. I have no qualms about hopping in the car (I love my Xterra) and going anywhere now. Again, thanks to Kim!! Next year I am hoping to get the whole week off and rent an apt there at Weirs Beach and just chill out with my friends in Christ! Can you imagine anything more awesome?
Ok well, I am allowing Roey to go back on Gaia...as of today...there are parental controls that may be enforced and I plan to enforce them, at the same time allowing her to be a trustworthy young lady. I believe she is.
Work is fabulous -- I love what I do and look forward to every day I go to work. God has truly blessed me and I believe, has allowed me to bless others through work. It's amazing how many Christians work in the VZ world of DSL. Oh, sorry, we are now known as HSI - High Speed Internet. Shhhhh, don't tell anyone I said "dsl" -- thanks!
All righty, for those of you with the fortitude (or enough coffee in you) to have read my entire life story to here, I commend you, thank you, it is a priviledge to share with you, and may God bless you, right where you are, may you feel His touch, right where you need it (whether you realized it or not!) and may God create a roadway in the wilderness for your feet to tread safely.
Love to you all,
LOLS
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As he said, I am currently learning to be a “tax widow” – as a CPA he is hardly around now, working late hours, working Saturday, then doing returns on the side. However, this is giving me time to work on other parts of my life – my house, my kids, my health, and most of all – my relationship with Christ.
that creep up on me, slam me for a day, then are gone as mysteriously as they came. However, since mid January, I seem to be doing MUCH BETTER (praise God!). Just had my yearly physical & the doctor said I HAD to lose the weight – I was too young and my family history between type 2 diabetes, heart disease, and high blood pressure was too ominous, I needed to start taking better care of myself. I agree ! I tire easily and have no stamina. Therefore, my daughter and I are going to try one week of the Flat Belly Diet…we have our menus and all our food, and although it will be quite a change, we are both looking forward to it ! I’m curious to see what a week on it will be like. The main thing is to eat sensibly but make sure you have a MUFA with each meal – MUFA = monounsaturated fats – the “good fat” that drives good cholesterol & weight loss. My cholesterol is good so far (yay!) and my blood pressure is a tad high, but not enough to treat with anything more than diet and exercise. We start this Monday (but had to factor in one cheat day – Friday 2/27 – she has youth group and I have a Bake&Bring in Andover). Joe is skeptical, but that’s ok, I will prove him wrong, be slimmer and more energetic, and he won’t be skeptical anymore. He very much wants us to exercise together once tax season settles down. That will be fun!
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